My name is Ruthie J.
I am 67 yrs. Old
My sobriety date is May 17, 2023
My home group is There is a Solution, a Thursday night Big Book study group in Lansing.
My parents married at a very young age. High school sweethearts. Before I turned 3 they were divorced. They both remarried about a year later. My brother and I grew up living with my mom and step dad and going to my dad and step mom’s every other weekend. They both lived totally different lifestyles and there was no alcohol in either home.
By the time I was 15, I was smoking, drinking and experimenting with drugs. My friends and I got drunk and high every weekend, then it went all week. In the 70s the drinking age was 18 and widely accepted. By the time I was 20, I was going from bar to bar, boyfriend to boyfriend and alcohol was already starting to cause me problems. There were abusive relationships, drunk driving, going to jail, wrecked cars, always moving around and constant chaos. At the age of 18, I hired into G.M. and somehow managed to go to work every day. Work was a party.
I continued this day after day for well over 40 years. Living on a roller coaster. I didn’t hang out with anyone that didn’t drink, and I didn’t do anything that didn’t involve alcohol. Eventually the drinking was every day, all day. I had to drink to function. A fifth of tequila was my best friend.
Somewhere along the line drinking wasn’t fun any more. I tried all the tricks to slow down swearing off getting drunk again but, by noon I would be well on my way. After an exceptionally bad day of drinking and putting myself and a close friend in harm’s way. I had a moment of clarity and realized I needed help. I surrendered to God and the desire to drink was gone. Even though the desire was gone, I knew I couldn’t stop on my own. I remembered hearing if you ever want to get sober go to an AA meeting. I spent three days trying to sober up and praying to God for help. I promised God I’d attend an AA meeting if I managed three days. I made it and the next day I walked into an AA meeting at noon at the Alano West Club.
I sat down and informed everyone that I needed assistance as I could not stop drinking. After the meeting I was given an 24-hour coin and told to come back, and things would get better. I was desperate not to drink so I came back and haven’t had to drink since that first day. Only by the grace of God, I came, came to and came to believe.
I had two to three meetings a day, asked for help not to pick up a drink and started taking suggestions. People spent time talking with me after meetings and I knew I belonged. I got some committed meetings, a sponsor and started doing service work. My sponsor started working me through the steps immediately. I can’t emphasize how much she has done for me. Since working through the steps, I have had many spiritual experiences, and hte promises have come true. I get up every morning and give thanks, ask for help, guidance, willingness and protection for my family and friends. I read AA sayings and literature. I either exercise, write or meditate, go to a meeting, take a nightly inventory and give thanks. I try to work the steps to the best of my ability and be a better person than I was the day before.
I struggle with mindfulness, staying in the moment and feelings, but I have a therapist and a sponsor to help me through my troubles.
I look forward to each new day. I want to keep growing spiritually and be of service to others.
I fully believe that the key to staying sober is being honest, open minded and willing, have gratitude and practice humility. If you want all the gifts this program has to offer, I suggest that you get a sponsor, work the steps, pray and go to meetings.
I love the fellowship of Alcoholics Anonymous and the endless gifts it has to offer.
I cannot stay sober alone!